Srimati reflects
Published in Connect magazine, August 2005
After 10 lifecoaching sessions, Thrivecraft's Srimati says it's all in Ruth's songs - and agrees Ruth can now coach herself through anything.
For me, it’s all in her songs – light and dark resolved in raw, beautiful truth. When Ruth sang for us (at our invitation) in our summery, flower- bedecked garden, we were very still. Love and death touched us with uncompromising silvery richness. It seemed to me that I was listening to Ruth’s very essence, and that, ultimately, this was what it was all about – drawing deep on soulful experience and fearlessly singing it to the world.
Perhaps Ruth’s singer songwriter dream life is beginning. She now has five songs prepared and performed her first open mike gig with her new guitarist only last night. Yet at her final coaching session last week she reported feeling frustrated with her ‘slow’ progress, and at how distant her dream life still feels. The truth is Ruth’s been dealing with an amazing amount on many different levels.
On one level Ruth’s coaching process has been about being bold enough to articulate big dreams, tackle her fear of failure, and start taking steps towards that vision. On another, it’s been about attending to smaller personal goals like getting fit, knocking caffeine on the head, de-cluttering the house, tackling the accounts backlog and going cycling more often with her son. On yet another, she’s been exploring the world of dating to see if she’s ready for a new relationship.
Deeper still, and beyond the remit of conventional coaching, Ruth’s been coming to terms with shattered love dreams and the shock of a friend’s murder, both of which made her question the spiritual ground she stood on. When such big things happen in our life it’s not an easy time to follow a programme of change or make great outward strides. It’s a time to go inward, deal with the disorientation and heal. Ruth has done so well considering this. One of my aims as Ruth’s coach on this level is to help her recognise the spiritual depth at which she is working and to be more patient and compassionate with herself.
Ruth had a bumpy start to her six month coaching programme, but in the spring, had a breakthrough. After coaching her friend through a difficult experience she had the realisation that she could coach her self through anything. She developed this realisation with me in session and for a while found her flow, trusted her self, and got a great deal done. More recently Ruth’s been very busy. She hasn’t had sufficient pause or regular enough coaching sessions to catch an overview. She lost her perspective, and her habitual fears and worries kicked up again. It’s been a difficult couple of months.
In our last session together Ruth needed help to regain that perspective. She also wanted to spend what time we had left clarifying the nuts and bolts of how to proceed rather than practising more subtle energetic and manifestation techniques.
What Ruth needs now are down-to-earth, practical ways forward. It is important for Ruth to know that there is method and structure to help her actually create the life she wants now she’s been bold enough to declare her dream publicly. She doesn’t want to be left with ‘airy-fairy new age ideas’ that don’t translate into hard outcomes. So, using the Thrivecraft ‘Planning for Change’ formula, Ruth has been learning how to prioritise her goals and take real steps in time and space. In doing so she will clarify what support and resources she needs to find, and how to practise rewarding and acknowledging what she’s achieving. This will become her own reality check practise, and keep her encouraged and motivated with whatever she tackles in the future.
The ten-session prize has been given, and Ruth’s free coaching programme is over. It feels a bit odd to be ending now, a bit of an anti-climax as we are probably not quite done. I have recommended that Ruth have some intensive therapeutic work, perhaps with Pat’s intuitive EFT and hypnotherapy, perhaps with the Brandon Bays Journey process. Other than that, Ruth can fall back on all the tools and methods I shared with her over the months. She can work with them now in her own good time, and of course I’m always available for a refresher if she needs it.
Ruth wondered if she was a challenging case to me. I guess it has been a bit edgy as there’s been a lot to deal with and it’s all been happening in the slightly unusual atmosphere of a competition. Ruth has a strong personality and by her own admission, has a tendency to dig her heels in. (Our last session involved a lot of laughing and a robust EFT session that began ‘Even though I’m bloody minded and resistant, I deeply and completely accept myself’) But it’s nothing I haven’t seen before, and I like a bit of honest intensity. I love that Ruth’s so deeply self aware and emotionally expressive. I sense the trust, liking and respect that has built up between us, and I’m really glad to know her in such a meaningful way. And when I heard her sing… Well, that makes it all doubly worthwhile.
Singing and song writing is at the heart of Ruth’s big dream. So please join with me for a moment to help energise what she is becoming:- Envisage her at her best, living her dream life to the full - singing, song writing, sharing her life with a wonderful partner, living in a beautiful house with her own recording studio, having great holidays, plenty of income, enjoying fitness, health and happiness. She will do the rest. After all, she can coach herself through anything.